Burnout Recovery: The Ultimate Guide to Rest and Recharge

In this conversation, Olajumoke Fatoki and Esther Avant discuss the critical issues of burnout and resilience in the workplace. They explore the signs of burnout, the importance of prioritizing health, and how personal development can enhance career success. Esther shares practical strategies for managing stress, building resilience, and the significance of communication and support systems in overcoming challenges. 

The discussion emphasizes the interconnectedness of personal health and professional performance, providing listeners with actionable insights to thrive in their careers. In this enlightening conversation, Olajumoke Fatoki and Esther discuss the critical importance of sleep, mindset shifts necessary to overcome burnout, the reality of work-life integration, and practical steps to move from overwhelm to empowerment. They emphasize the need for self-awareness, accountability, and the significance of prioritizing health to enhance overall performance and well-being.

Takeaways

Burnout is a chronic state of elevated stress.
Recognizing the signs of burnout is crucial for recovery.
Communication with superiors can help address workplace stress.
Delegation and asking for help are essential skills.
Prioritizing health can enhance career performance.
Micro breaks throughout the day can recharge your energy.
Sleep is foundational for resilience and overall health.
Building a support system is vital for managing stress.
Habits should be developed gradually to avoid overwhelm.
Self-reflection is key to understanding personal challenges. Sleep is often undervalued but is essential for productivity.
Taking care of yourself enhances your performance and ambition.
Mindset shifts are crucial for overcoming burnout.
Work-life integration is achievable with intentionality.
Self-awareness is foundational for personal growth.
Quick wins can help build momentum when feeling overwhelmed.
Accountability can significantly reduce feelings of overwhelm.
Recognizing patterns in behavior can lead to better self-regulation.
Gratitude practices can foster a positive outlook on life.
It's important to prioritize health to enjoy the benefits of success.

Transcript

Olajumoke Fatoki (10:42.139)
Hello guys and welcome to this week's edition of the Thrive Careers podcast. My name is Olajumoke Fatoki. I am your host. And today we have been joined by a very inspiring guest, Esther Avant, who is a wellness coach and she's been able to pivot from being a wellness coach into personal development coaching.

, and helping people achieve their career goals. I bet she has a lot to offer and to share with us on this call today. So if you would just sit back, relax and enjoy the conversation. Thank you. Hi Esther, welcome. Thank you for joining us on this call. would like to, you know, for you to just do another brief intro, apart from what I said, so our audience can get to know you better.

Esther (11:36.597)
Sure. Thank you so much for having me and thank you guys for tuning in. I have worked in the health and wellness industry for almost 20 years and in that time helped hundreds of people with their health and weight loss goals. And in that time, I saw so much spillover that the same clients who were being successful in their health were also thriving in their personal lives. Their careers were skyrocketing.

And I started to realize just how applicable the skills that we learn through our health endeavors are to the rest of our goals. So I'm really excited to talk with you today about burnout and resilience and how devoting some time and energy to your health isn't actually a distraction or a time consuming, selfish thing. In fact, it will help you thrive in your career.

and be at the top of your game for longer.

Olajumoke Fatoki (12:37.148)
Thank you so much for that introduction. I mean, there is no better time to talk about addressing burnout, you know, in the workforce today. It's a very, it's an all-important topic that we cannot overemphasize. So I'm excited that we're having this conversation. And like I told you during our pre-chance, that it's something I'm also personally interested in, you know, a lot of chaos here and there. It would be nice to hear from a professional like you.

in that field and get practical steps that we can take to get better. So yeah. All right, so to kick things off on this episode, have an icebreaker question that I like to share with my guests. And it's a fun one. So with your smile, I know you're ready. So I'm just going to shoot, all right? So if your career journey

were to be a movie. What would the title be and why?

Esther (13:41.845)
The first thing that comes to mind, I'll just shoot from the hip, is the winding road. And it would be titled that because everything that I've done, my last 20 years of coaching and writing and now getting into speaking have all sort of followed a similar trajectory. Everything has been related, but the path hasn't been straightforward. It's been sort of this meandering winding road of doing this, learning from that, adding this.

and over time has turned into what it is. But if you had asked me 20 years ago, would you know, do I think I will have published a book? Do you think that I would be speaking and having a podcast and going on podcasts? I would have said absolutely not. So I think that's that's why I would go with that title.

Olajumoke Fatoki (14:27.258)
It's amazing. Thank you. Thank you so much for sharing that with us. And I would also like to know what inspired you to start this, your journey from branching out from the wellness, nutrition, and all of those fitness kind of thing into personal development and helping people achieve their career and personal goals. What inspired you?

Esther (14:56.821)
I think it just seemed like such a logical step that, like I said, I kept seeing clients who were the same ones who were successfully checking off their health and weight loss goals were also the ones who would come to our coaching calls and say, I put in for a promotion or I've started this side business or my relationships are thriving. And I was realizing.

We tend to sort of silo out this is my work life, this is my personal life, this is my individual stuff. But the reality of it is the same skills and qualities that we develop in one area can benefit us in another. And what I've seen is that especially in ambitious and career driven professionals, it tends to be our health that sort of ends up on the back burner. We want to be people who have this work life balance and we try really hard to

make sure that we're still present for our families and thriving in our careers. And the area that ends up taking the hit is our personal health. And instead of that being one of those things that we can focus on after this next promotion or when the kids are older or once things calm down, which they never will, I really want to help people see that it's essential to prioritize your health and the time and energy that you spend doing so.

is going to benefit you in your career. The confidence that you build, the ability that you have to uphold your commitments to yourself and to others, the willingness you have to advocate for yourself, to ask for what you need, to set boundaries, to push through things that are difficult, to see obstacles as challenges to overcome rather than insurmountable roadblocks. All of those things.

you can develop while you're working on your health in just really simple day-to-day ways that will then spill over into your job and you'll find that you're more likely to speak up in meetings, share your ideas to own, you know, actually, you know, I'm the person who suggested that instead of kind of shrinking back to say, I would like to put in for this promotion or I deserve a raise and here's why. And when you, you know, when your project hits a snag, you're more likely to

Esther (17:17.171)
be a problem solver and seek those solutions instead of saying, uh-oh, I don't know what to do, I'm stuck, somebody save me. All things will make you more valuable as an employee, as an executive, as a business owner, whatever it is that you do in your career.

Olajumoke Fatoki (17:32.425)
Fantastic. I think this is just a very well-rounded conversation and I'm loving, you know, the way we are going into it because it addresses every, you know, area of life at the end of the day. It speaks to every aspect of life and it's interesting to know that, you know, even though we tend to try to put our lives in different buckets, they

sort of intertwined and you can't really separate one from the other. If you're not doing well in a certain area, it has a way of affecting the other area. Especially this area of health that we are talking about and a lot of people tend to put it in the back burner, just trying to chase their dreams and all of that. And at the end of the day, they don't take care of their health. are unable to reach their career milestones

that they set for themselves. So great foundation. Thank you so much Esther. So now we're getting into our core questions for today. And the first one is born out. know, born out is more than a buzzword. It's a word that a lot of people throw around these days and you tend to just think that it's a buzzword. But I know that it is deeper than that, especially for those who have experienced it.

And I can tell you that I for one, there was a time in my career that I experienced this. So I have an idea. But it would be nice to hear from you. So this is a word that is also clearly misunderstood. So how do you define burnout and what are its key warning signs, especially for ambitious professionals?

Esther (19:16.861)
I love this question. love starting out with definitions. That's something I always do when I'm interviewing guests also is let's just make sure we're on the same page, where we're talking about the same thing. So the way I think about burnout is it's beyond exhaustion. It's not just that you're tired from life. We all have lot going on. We all feel tired sometimes. It's this chronic state of elevated stress where your motivation, your performance, your

Olajumoke Fatoki (19:26.163)
Mm-hmm.

Esther (19:44.777)
like your enthusiasm, your zest, just plunge. And I almost feel like you feel like you're walking around like a shell of yourself where someone could look at you and see, you know, she's present, she's here, she's in the boardroom, she's at the meeting, but you just sort of feel like you're kind of a zombie going through the motions rather than really being present and engaged. And you just feel like you don't have the oomph to...

give kind of more than the bare minimum. And I think one of the main indicators is just that shift in I used to be someone who enjoyed what I did for work. I used to be someone who saw those challenges as opportunities. I used to be someone who felt engaged in my career and saw a trajectory for myself and wanted to work for something. And now I just sort of feel like I'm dragging myself out of bed. I'm doing my best to show up. I'm sort of

Collecting the paycheck, but I'm not passionate about it anymore I just feel like whatever is the least I have to do to get through this day and get myself, you know back to bed or you know in some cases back to a Drink or a glass of wine or you know, whatever kind of vice you might use to try to cope with that stress Those are some of the the key indicators that I see Just you know general fatigue irritability

you might be noticing feelings of dread about work. I know I had a job where I felt burnt out for a time and just every night before bed had kind of those like the Sunday scaries, but on a daily basis of, I just really don't want to do this. know, what if maybe there'll be a, maybe there'll be some sort of natural disaster and I won't have to go in. If you're having those, those thoughts of, you know, I would rather do anything than, than go to work. That's probably a pretty good sign that you're experiencing.

Olajumoke Fatoki (21:19.775)
Okay.

Esther (21:40.637)
either burnout or you just hate your job. But if it's something that you used to love and now you're feeling that way toward that, those are pretty good indicators.

Olajumoke Fatoki (21:49.771)
Awesome. And as you were sharing, I was just trying to remember because I love examples a lot. So, and I love to think in pictures. So I was just thinking, you know, I mentioned during my introduction that this is something that also encountered myself, something that I had experienced and I was trying to drill down to the exact point when I knew that this for real is what they call burnout.

So for me, I started to pull out from the team. So I was that team member that was usually engaged. I was always bubbling, you know, I always have ideas to share, you know, I'm always all about teamwork, collaboration, let's get the work going, you know, but I started to pull out, I started to withdraw. I wasn't excited anymore about, you know, coming to work and I wasn't even interested in having conversations with my...

I was just tired. I was both physically and mentally exhausted and I wanted out. This is the direction I want us to talk, to speak to now because I don't know if that was the right response in looking back right now. I don't know if that was the right response.

I was going through all of that, I didn't know how to manage it and I felt, you know what, maybe this organization is no longer right for me. And I started to, you know, to plan my exit strategy. And I didn't even plan it well because I just sort of pulled out like, you know, this is beginning to affect my mental health and I'll just stay away from it. And the downside of that was I was out of job for,

a few months,  for the benefit of those who might be going through this right now, on the back of the explanation and the definitions that we have given, when they begin to these signs and signals, you know, what should be the response? Is it time to pull back? Is it time to, you know, what should be the response?

Esther (24:14.035)
That's an excellent question because you're right. We do tend to jump to the conclusion that it must be this specific job. It must be this organization, this role. Therefore, I should start looking elsewhere. And certainly that is an option. But the thing you want to be careful about is if the reason you're feeling burnt out isn't because you dislike the job or there's something actually wrong with the organization that is unchangeable.

Olajumoke Fatoki (24:14.157)
You can save it up.

Esther (24:43.549)
it's entirely possible that you're addressing the wrong issue. You are thinking, if I just get a job here, then this would all take care of itself. But really, it's your inability to deal with the stressors in a healthy way. And you may find that wherever you work or whatever you're doing, you end up feeling the same way. And the common denominator is you. And it doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you.

It just means that there are skills that you can work on developing that will help you be more resilient in whatever role it is that you're in. So I think one of the first things that is helpful to do when you start to feel these changes happening is to kind of take a step back. I'm a big fan of writing things down. So, you know, make a list in whatever way works for you to actually ask yourself,

What are the things that are contributing to my feeling this way? And I think it's important to take some responsibility. And if you notice that for every single thing on your list, you have pointed the finger at someone else, there's probably something to learn from that because you're always playing a role. And I think it's kind of a double edged sword to take responsibility because on one hand, it doesn't feel great to be like, oh, I've been letting these people walk all over me or I've been saying yes to all of these

Olajumoke Fatoki (25:40.286)
Mm.

Esther (26:04.885)
things that I should have set better boundaries about. But at the same time, when you recognize the role that you're playing, then you're better able to say, well, this is great news because that means I have a role to play in changing these things. So before you start looking to jump ship and go somewhere else and just kind of hope that the grass is greener, I would say, what are the things that I could be doing to help myself right now? And this is, you know, there are tons of things that you could be doing. Maybe it's an issue of

communication with your team or your superior to express your needs. Maybe it's about setting boundaries. Maybe it's about a willingness to ask for help. Maybe you're the person that although you're part of a team, you're always kind of shouldering the burden of, I'll do that or no, don't you worry about this. I'll do that. And you're doing the lion's share, not even necessarily because everybody else is lazy or unwilling, just because you've offered. So maybe it's about you learning to say,

I can't and don't need to do all of this myself. I need to learn how to let other people do things. I need to learn about, you know, delegating and not putting everything on my own shoulders. Maybe it's that you fear for your role. You don't feel like you have kind of the assurance that you...

are gonna continue to have a job so you feel like you need to overwork or outwork everyone else in order to have that kind of security. And maybe you want to have a conversation with your boss and get some reassurance or find out what are the most valuable things that I should be doing right now because I can't keep doing everything. And this is something I talk about in my book, which again has this carryover to career, is the idea of figuring out the big rocks

in your health or your career, what are the things that make the biggest difference? So your company, your organization would probably have you, would probably rather have you focus on a few things that really make a difference for the business than for you to be having a hand in every single thing that's happening, but not really making any substantial progress. And the same applies to our health. Very often,

Olajumoke Fatoki (28:19.229)
Hmm.

Esther (28:22.079)
when we're feeling burnt out, we're not taking time for ourselves. We're not engaging in stress management techniques. We're probably not eating super well. We're not making time to exercise or get fresh air. So figuring out what are some small daily shifts that I can make to take time for myself, to learn how to prioritize my health in a way that'll help me manage my stress. So there's a lot in that answer, but very long-winded way of saying, before you assume that the...

the specific role you're in at that organization is the problem, I would start thinking about what, even if you do decide to leave, it's probably gonna be a process, like you said. And if you don't want to have that sort of like, well, I jumped in now, like I'm flailing, need to figure it out, then maybe you say, it is that I don't want to work at this job anymore. And also I don't want to not have a backup plan. I don't wanna not have a job lined up. So I'm gonna give myself three to six months while I'm job searching to also,

work on taking care of myself and addressing this burnout within myself so that when I do get in the next role, I have these habits in place and I'm less likely to find myself burnt out in a different role.

Olajumoke Fatoki (29:31.243)
Awesome, awesome, awesome. So much to unpack there and I this means of that. three things stood out for me just as a recap so we can learn this particular plane. So you spoke about communication. I think that's a really big deal.

I really cannot remember that I truly sat down to have a conversation with my boss to discuss what I was going through. I was just internalizing it and that didn't go well. So yes, communication, I agree that's a big one. And also delegation, especially when you are the type that has a lot of energy and take care of all of that. You also need to know how to delegate or ask for help.

when you need it. guess I also didn't do that and I felt overwhelmed and I felt overwhelmed and I just thought you know what I can't do this anymore instead of looking for help. So and the last thing I heard you say was prioritizing your health as well you know and also being able to you know do what is important versus doing everything.

you know focusing on the importance that the big rocks that brings the biggest results like the 80 20 principle you know that kind of thing as against doing so many things and appearing as you know you're here and everywhere and you're really not making so much difference thank you i i love i love that and i think that that would be of immense value to people who would listen

to this podcast. Thank you, Esther, for sharing that with us. All right, so we'll move on to our second question for today. I love habits because they can be replicated. And once you have been able to build them over time, they become part of us. So my next question is about building habits for resilience.

Olajumoke Fatoki (31:45.206)
What are some habits or daily practices that professionals can adopt to build resilience and prevent burnout? I know that these questions are intertwined, but take it away.

Esther (31:57.331)
Yeah, no, it's an excellent follow-up, because you're exactly right. That's what we're talking about is how do I become someone who is better able to handle the stressors of my life and my job? And habits are the perfect place to start. So I want to start with one that is very easy to implement immediately. And that is the idea of taking kind of like micro breaks throughout the day, or I like to call them kind of recharging breaks, just like five minutes.

Olajumoke Fatoki (32:08.075)
Mm-hmm.

Esther (32:26.157)
once or twice a day. When I had that job that I mentioned earlier where I was feeling burnt out and dreaded going to it, I would go to it was at a community center and I would lock myself in the locker room and I would do a five minute meditation midday just to kind of regulate my emotions and remind myself that life existed outside these four walls and that you know I could get through the rest of the day. And

I like to think of this as just like you can't be on your phone all day without draining the battery and getting into the red. You can't expect yourself to go through a busy, hectic, chaotic day without pumping the brakes for a couple of minutes and giving yourself a chance to recharge. And it's not that a five minute break is going to get your battery up to 100%. I like to think of it as it's

It's getting you or it's keeping you out of the red, you know, when you get under that 20%, your phone is like, Hey, plug me in. It's kind of like that. So if you just build in the habit of taking these small breaks, you can help yourself stay out of that kind of danger zone and feel like you have the resilience to get through the day. So that's an easy one. No matter who you are, what you do, where you work. You can sneak off to the bathroom for a few minutes. You can do a meditation on your phone. You can just do, you know,

five minutes of deep breathing and reminding yourself of, I can get through this, I'm good at my job, whatever sort of positive kind of mantra type things would make you feel good. That's a really easy place to start. I think ultimately we want to be consistent with the basics. We want to be having regular sleep schedules where we're not burning the candle at both ends, working till 2 a.m., waking up at 4 a.m.

We want to be getting at least six, seven hours of sleep, eating balanced and nutritious meals, resting and relaxing, exercising, walking, et cetera. We want to be doing those things consistently. And those are the big rocks of health. But you want to approach them gradually. All of this, building habits successfully requires consistent action. And in order to be consistent, you can't feel like it's a second job.

Esther (34:49.311)
So you really want to break down what are like one or two areas of my health that I know I could improve. And if you're not sure, I would start with sleep because that has such a cascade effect on other things. When you're under rested, you're irritable. You don't have the energy to get through a normal day, let alone exercise on top of it. You have more cravings for essentially empty calories.

you, it's harder for you to feel satiated when you are eating. So if you don't know where to start, starting with sleep is a great place, but just pick a couple of areas and work on gradual improvements. Ask yourself, where am I now? Where would I like to be? You know, how would I like to be exercising four days a week? Would I like to be eating, you know, mostly foods that I cook at my house, figure out kind of what your end goal is, and then reverse engineer. What, what are some steps that will help me get there without feeling like it's a drastic overhaul?

So that's another one, your sleep, your exercise, your nutrition, those all create the foundation for a resilient person. And then I'd say the last one is something that we touched on a little bit earlier, is developing a support system around yourself. This is something else that I talk about in my book and how we're sort of...

Olajumoke Fatoki (35:57.372)
.

Esther (36:12.873)
Conditioned to be these independent people and sort of feel like I shouldn't need any help. I Can do everything on my own and that's not untrue you are capable but you don't have to do things all by yourself and I think truly resilient people recognize that they don't need to do it alone that having a community of peers having a mentor having a coach having people who support you and want to see you succeed

makes everything easier, both from an accountability standpoint, from modeling the behaviors that you're trying to develop in your own life, finding those people who you feel like just kind of figured it out. Maybe the person, a role above you at your company who you know has a family, exercises, always seems to have a nutritious lunch, and striking up a conversation with that person.

Figuring out, like, what is it that they're doing? How is it that they're thinking that maybe I'm not yet and I could learn something from them? And the more you can surround yourself with like-minded people who support you, inspire you, and can help you get to where you want to be, the easier it's going to be. Not to mention the benefits of having sounding boards for your emotions and for your feelings and just be able to say, you know, maybe you don't go to your mentor for this, but maybe you have a trusted friend who you can just say,

work is a lot right now and I would love it if I could just vent for a few minutes. I don't need solutions, I don't need help, I just need an outlet to get this off my chest so that then I can feel better equipped to sort of pick myself up and do something about it.

Olajumoke Fatoki (37:49.466)
Interesting. Interesting. Thank you so much, Esther. So many things you said and I agree with every single one of them, but there is a particular one that I feel a lot of us tend to overlook or we haven't given it the deserved attention and I'm one of them.

And that's the subject of sleep.

Olajumoke Fatoki (38:24.087)
I think that a lot of us, know, in a bid to meet up our goals, you know, to do so many things that we've outlined for ourselves, we cut down on our sleep time. And maybe that's one of the reasons why, you know, there's a lot of angry people on the road. People who haven't had enough sleep. And I just want you to sort of, you know, tell us more about

the beauty of sleep and doing it well. So we don't think that the time that we spend sleeping, sometimes I feel that way, it's like I'm wasting away. There are things that I need to do. Get up. And I deny myself of the normal hours of sleep, which is six to seven hours. I just deny myself of that hours of sleep just to be able to put in more. How do we balance that?

Esther (39:22.643)
You're so right. And I would say as a society, we almost celebrate lack of sleep. It's sort of a badge of honor of, I only sleep four hours a night. It's not a great thing. And it's making everything harder. And it's hard to make that connection because you often do see people or feel like, I myself don't sleep.

the recommended amount and I'm getting by. But it's one of those things that as your sleep debt grows, eventually you're going to pay the price. It might not be in the short term, but it is one of the major contributors to burnout. So it's one of those things that if you can address earlier on, you can avoid going down that road of just really becoming a mess. So you want to kind of preemptively prioritize it, which is tough because

preemptively, you don't feel like you need to, but it beats getting to the point where there's no question, like I need to do this. So I think it's really important to notice the thoughts we have about sleep. And I'd say most people kind of have the same mentality you do, and I used to as well, of sleep is kind of a waste or sleep is preventing me from getting things done. I have too much on my plate.

to sleep. need to get this done tonight. Therefore, I need to stay up until it's done or I need to wake up early and get it done. And certainly on certain occasions, that's true. I'm not saying every single night of your life, you need to be sleeping for seven hours or else, you know, something terrible is going to happen. I'm talking about, you know, chronically. So yeah, if there's a deadline that you're under and you're just like, yeah, I'm going to be having a little bit of extra coffee and a little bit less sleep. I'll get through this and then I can, you know, kind of recalibrate. Fine.

But on a regular basis, if you are finding yourself working really late or working late and then feeling like because I didn't have time to relax, now I want to do it. And my only time for myself is midnight to 2 AM. Or if I want to exercise, I need to wake up at 4 AM to do it. And if you just find that little by little, you're kind of chipping away at your sleep time, I think it's really important to work on reframing what sleep.

Esther (41:51.089)
means to you. The way I think about it now is if I want to be productive during the day, if I want to be bringing my best thoughts, my best, you know, kind of my ambition to what I do on a daily basis, I need to sleep. And I think often we get so used to not being well rested that we don't notice the impact that it's having on us until

Olajumoke Fatoki (41:53.189)
and

Esther (42:19.815)
we get into a better habit and we notice the increase in energy, the better mood that we have, how much more quickly we get things done. And then you start to realize, huh, I must've really not been my best before because look at how much better I'm feeling now. So what I think is really interesting about sleep is that I talk about it to everybody and just about everybody says, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it's important. I know what to do. But most of us aren't doing those things, right?

Nobody's gonna argue that no, I think it's it's it's a good idea that I'm doom-scrolling on my phone Minutes before I'm trying to go to sleep We all know less screen time You know cool dark environment to do some something relaxing to kind of unwind Before you try to fall asleep You know no screens on Have a consistent bedtime and wake up that sort of thing, but most of us aren't doing those things

Olajumoke Fatoki (42:59.974)
Mm.

Esther (43:18.817)
And there's no secret. People always want there to be like, well, what am I missing? Nothing. You're missing just doing those basic things. So start with some kind of math. What time do you need to wake up in the morning in order to get done the things that you need to do before you go to work? Based on that wake up time, what time do you need to be doing lights out in order to get seven-ish hours of sleep? If you need to be doing lights out at that time,

What time do you need to start doing kind of the bedtime ritual, brushing your teeth, washing your face, getting in bed with your book, that sort of thing. And you may be pleasantly surprised. You may realize, huh, if I were just a little bit more intentional with my time, I could make that happen pretty easily. Or you might be like, there are several hours I am, I'm going to come up short if I do it. So all of this comes down back to doing things gradually.

If you're in the habit of sleeping four or five hours a night, you don't need to jump immediately to seven or eight hours. Just work on getting a little bit closer and a little bit closer. And as you start to feel the benefits, you're then going to be that much more motivated and bought into, yeah, you know what? This is worth doing. And then you take the next step. So give yourself time to get there. But I guarantee if you go from under rested to consistently well rested, you're going to feel amazing. And that right there could.

could solve your burnout if you're just able to prioritize that and not always chip away at your sleep.

Olajumoke Fatoki (44:51.232)
Awesome, awesome, awesome. Thank you so much, Esther. I think that was really, that was really enlightening. Cause I, if you notice, I opened up every part of me because I really wanted to take care of it.

as much as I can and you were able to really expand shades on that. And the key for me is consistency and also giving myself grace. I don't just want to go from zero to a hundred. I can work at my own pace and the most important thing is to keep at it, be consistent and to also begin to look at the benefits that I would gain from it.

as motivating factor for me to be able to do that. So yeah, thank you so much. That was really good. And now let's talk about mental mindset shifts. Let's talk about mindset shifts. Because a lot of those things start internally. Everything that we tend to experience physically first happens in the mind. So if we don't have the right mindset about certain things,

you know, they were not going to achieve the kind of results that we should get. So it all begins from the mind. That's all I'm trying to say. So let's talk about mindset, you know, that word, the kind of mindset shifts we need to have to overcome burnout. So the question is, how can individuals reframe their mindset to balance ambition and well-being without compromising their goals?

you get that?

Esther (46:33.681)
Yes, such a good question. So I think part one is recognizing that taking care of yourself will enhance your performance. It will feed into your ambition and help you be more successful in your career rather than it being a distraction from your success. It doesn't need to be this either or I can either be a healthy person or I can be successful in my career. They are one in the same. And if you look at

CEOs and a lot of the most successful people that maybe you look up to or strive to be, they are often very disciplined with their health as well. And rather than seeing it as like kind of this push-pull, one is almost a requirement for the other. So I think just like we were talking about with sleep and realizing, you know, taking notice of if you are positioning sleep as something unnecessary that you don't have time for.

and the difference between that and I need this and it helps me. The same goes for taking care of your health. If you're telling yourself, I couldn't possibly make time for that because then I would fail at my job. You got to reframe that into, it's essential for me to take care of myself because if I don't, I will not be able to achieve my full potential in my career. Or if I am in a position where I am at the top of my game, I have reached my full potential. Well.

I probably want to stay there as long as I possibly can. I probably want to reap the benefits of being that leader or being in this top position for as long as possible. And taking care of my health is the way to do that from a longevity standpoint as well. So that's the first one is that those two things are one and the same. They're not at odds. I think the second is the importance of having a growth mindset.

as opposed to a fixed one. So we talked about this at the very beginning where rather than seeing obstacles as insurmountable, I'm stuck, I don't know what to do, or this is a threat to me, we see opportunities and learning experiences. And there's nowhere better to start developing that mindset than with your health, where

Esther (48:52.169)
Just an easy example is say you decided I'm going to start bringing my lunch to work so that I stop ordering takeout, spending the money on it, eating way too much, but I forget my lunch. Instead of throwing up your hands, well, I tried, and better luck tomorrow. I guess there's nothing I can do. I guess I'm just not cut out for this. You get resourceful. And you think, OK, I forgot my lunch. No big deal. What else could I do? And you start to deal with a very small example.

You just start to flex that muscle of I'm never stuck. There's always a solution and I want to start to find it. And if I fall short of my expectations, I'm not a failure. I've learned something. Let me figure out what those those nuggets are and let me apply them to my endeavors in the future so that I'm more successful. And once you develop that mindset, you have opportunities to practice it both in your career and with regards to your health. And I think on the back of that,

is the importance of recognizing that you are not going to be perfect. You are going to make mistakes. And this all or nothing mentality that we have that if I'm not up at 5 a.m. to do my two hour long workout and then drink my green juice, I can't be healthy or I can't ever possibly show an imperfection at work because then I'll get fired or I'll never get promoted. Recognizing that you like everyone else.

are imperfect humans and that it doesn't need to be all or nothing. The consistency that you mentioned earlier is going to beat, know, consistency in the long run is going to be short term intensity all of the time. And when you let go of that all or nothing mentality and kind of embrace that growth mindset, you're able to kind of take your knocks and say, OK, I learned something from this and next time I'm to be even more successful. You hear every successful business owner.

say things along those lines that, you they had dozens of false starts. They have dozens of failed companies in their wake before they stumbled on eBay or Amazon or whatever the thing is. Successful people aren't scared of trying because they know the only way to figure things out is to do your best, given what you know and what you have at the time, to learn from it.

Esther (51:15.261)
and continue to iterate until you figure out what's gonna work. So I think those mindset shifts will really help professionals beat burnout, develop resilience, and balance their ambition with their wellbeing.

Olajumoke Fatoki (51:31.881)
Interesting, interesting. You call this growth mindset work. For me, looks like it's term that I'm coming to, a word that I'm coming to terms with recently, which is progress over perfection. know, progress over perfection. Because I've been there.

When I tell myself, I want to start working out two hours every day and maybe one morning I wake up and I don't feel like it and I'll just quit from there. I won't just go back soon because I missed one day and then I'll stop the entire process. And then of course I don't get the results that I set my mind to achieve when I started that particular goal. So what I'm learning is, know, progress over perfection and giving myself grace.

Just like you have said, if I don't, if I'm unable to meet up, you know, in a particular week, I pick it up the next week again, I don't just quit, you know, and that way it has become an habit. And I see why you attached it to a mindset shift. You know, it has become a mindset for me that I don't need to get it right the first time, but I can get it right over time.

if i stay at it you know so i think these these are really important you know nuggets for people to de-stify this whole subject of burnout you know and living their best life so i'm excited that we've been able to go um in this direction and i also love the way we shared in the stories of great business people that we all look up to today and you know

how they were able to make these decisions at some point. And that's why we are still able to hear about them today because if not, you know, probably would not have heard about them. So these things are very important and thanks Esther for sharing with us. Before we go into the last two questions for today, I always like to check in with my guests. So how are you feeling so far? If you have to describe your feeling right now.

Olajumoke Fatoki (53:48.707)
on the episode so far, how would you?

Esther (53:52.581)
I would say I'm feeling inspired. I love this kind of dialogue and hearing your thoughts and your personal experiences and just how well they tie into everything that we're talking about. It's making me feel like what we're saying is relevant to the people listening. And my hope is that it inspires someone to take a small action that we've talked about today. And I'm excited that we have a little bit more time to continue doing that.

Olajumoke Fatoki (54:22.498)
and you hit it right on because that's really what this is about giving people those practical steps those strategies that you can implement like in the immediate and you know begin to see results so yeah thank you and I think that's all been enjoying in this conversation so far and we're about to turn it up even even higher all right so we have two more questions and this one is

very interesting because by background and by training, I'm a certified human resources professional. And this term or this concept has been around for a while. Different people have called it different things. It has evolved, you know, work life integration. used to be work life balance. I know another school of thought that calls it work life harmony. You know.

Is it really a myth? I think we can start from there. Is it a myth or is it achievable? Is it something that is doable or is just, you know, up there in our minds?

Esther (55:31.337)
That's a great question. I do think it's doable and I can use my personal experience and that of many of my clients kind of as anecdotal evidence for that. I do think that it requires intentionality, that it's unlikely that many of us are going to stumble on kind of this harmony inadvertently. It has to be an intentional thing to

Olajumoke Fatoki (55:42.603)
awesome.

Esther (55:58.901)
prioritize the things that are important to us and be protective of our time and energy to make sure that it's not getting zapped by things that we don't actually care about, but that in fact we are putting the parameters in place to make sure that we're giving ourselves the opportunity to do the things that matter to us, like be with our families and thrive in our careers. And I actually appreciate the...

the movement away from work-life balance because I think, although it's, you know, partly it's just semantics, but balance sort of makes it seem like you have a pie that needs to be divided evenly into segments and that at all times you need to have those even segments. And if you don't, your work-life balance is off and you're doing something wrong. And it's more of this, I want to say balancing act, is, you not the right word for it.

Olajumoke Fatoki (56:53.438)
.

Esther (56:54.101)
but it's more of a flow, I guess, where I like to think, I think work-life balance or work-life integration, I think, sells us a little bit short because again, it doesn't even mention our health. We've got our work, we've got our lives, but it doesn't specifically mention our health. So I like to go with work-life health integration. And I think what's really important to remember is that

Olajumoke Fatoki (57:08.914)
Hmm.

Esther (57:23.369)
those things and their demands on your time energy are always in flux. There just are times of your life when your job is more demanding than others and something else has to give. There just are times when your family needs more of you. Say you are newly postpartum and you are keeping an infant alive. Your family life.

Olajumoke Fatoki (57:43.321)
.

Esther (57:49.681)
is going to monopolize more of your resources than other than it might under normal circumstances. And that's okay. And it's okay for your sort of I like to think of of dials for your dials to get turned up and down based on your life overall. So if you say an accountant is such an easy example when you have your you do taxes, you know, I have a very distinct

busy season when I'm working way more than I normally do when I do the rest of the year. Something has to give. I can't work more and still do all the things that I normally do because there are not enough hours in the day. So maybe that's the time when you turn the sleep dial down a little bit and you say, okay, instead of shooting for my seven, I'm going to be okay for the next few weeks while I'm super busy if I'm getting five or six. Don't love it.

but something has to give. Maybe you know, actually if I sacrifice sleep at all, my work is gonna suffer. My sleep has to remain, but I'm gonna be, instead of exercising for 45 minutes, five days a week, gonna do kind of the minimum, I'm gonna do 20 minutes, three days a week. Maybe instead of cooking my meals and spending a couple hours a week doing those things, I lean on a meal delivery service and now,

I freed up a few hours that I used to spend doing food related stuff and now I put it towards work. knowing, you know, or maybe when I'm busy at work, I don't attend all of my kids sporting events. I like to be there. I want to be there as much as I can. I know that from this date to this date, I just can't make it work. But then once my busy season dies down, I readjust those dials. I exercise more. I start cooking again.

Olajumoke Fatoki (59:27.291)
.

Esther (59:47.091)
I'm more present with my family. What's important is that you never go too long with one of those important buckets of your life being on the back burner. But the idea that it always needs to be evenly divided puts so much pressure on us to like be doing all things at all times and then that contributes to burnout.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:00:07.363)
Amazing, amazing, amazing. That's an interesting perspective to it because, sorry, at least struggle with this aspect of their lives.

Esther (01:00:16.629)
you

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:00:25.572)
career professionals, people who are still young and they have their whole life ahead of them. And there's always that struggle to marry their career ambitions, their career goals with their personal lives. And from the conversations that we've had so far, it's actually that integration that can really birth sustainable success.

you know so like if if you were to give a candid advice you know on achieving this what would it be on achieve

Esther (01:01:07.401)
Great question. So I think what we just talked about, the fact that the personal and professional goals actually support each other, they're not in competition, and also they're fluid. So recognizing you don't always need to be doing the exact same things in order to be kind of doing this balancing act. And that there are times when you turn the effort in one area of your life up,

and the others get turned down. And as long as you're aware of this and you know, okay, in the future, I'm gonna need to make some adjustments, that's fine. I think one of the most important things is the kind of big rocks idea that we were talking about is identifying your top priorities and the specific actions within them to make sure that you schedule those before smaller things just kind of take over.

your time. So this might look like blocking out your calendar for family time, blocking out your calendar for your walks or your workouts.

There's, I don't remember where I heard this the first time, but I've heard it said that you can get a really good idea of what people value by looking at their calendars. And what happens is that most of us have this, you know, we start off with a blank calendar and then work monopolizes a whole bunch. And then we are just not intentional about carving out and protecting the time that we need for the other things that are important to us. So that I think

is a really important step is not just identifying my family is important to me, my health is important to me, but also what specifically am I going to do this day, this week that is an investment in those things. If I'm saying they're important to me, but I look at my calendar and the entire day is work meetings and I'm just kind of crossing my fingers and hoping that I'll get home before the kids go to bed or hoping that for some reason I'll wake up really early and I'll want to exercise if we're.

Esther (01:03:18.909)
if we're letting work take over everything and just kind of hoping for the best with the other areas of importance, we got to be more intentional about that. And we have to schedule in those meetings with ourselves, with our families, just like we would with work to make sure that they get done. And I think a huge one in this kind of balancing act is the importance of communication and setting boundaries. And this really goes hand in hand, but there was, interviewed a

a career coach for my podcast, To Your Health, a while ago. And she was saying that she had noticed this difference between men and women in that if women had their schedule blocked out for something, didn't really matter what the thing was, they were much quicker to just kind of throw that out the window if someone asked them to do something for work. Okay, can you sit in on this meeting or I'm going to need you to finish this report. They were quick to say like, yeah, sure. And, you know, not even mentioned.

Well, I had had this thing where she'd seen men, whether it was a networking event or, you know, around a golf or just, know, my schedule is blocked out. They were a lot more assertive with, I'm not available at that time. Didn't need to like make excuses, try to soften it, just set the boundary. I'm unavailable. If you need me at that meeting, it'll have to be, you know, here's my, here are my open times, or if I need to get their report done, I can have it by this date, but they, they were better at upholding their boundaries. And I think that's.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:04:30.403)
Hmm.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:04:43.068)
So, thank

Esther (01:04:47.007)
such an important one is we tend to tell ourselves, I couldn't, you know, I can't just block out my schedule. You know, it'll be a problem with my boss. We kind of make up these stories in our heads that often aren't the case. And, you know, number one, you could just try and see what happens. Or number two, you could go to that person and say, I need to be setting better boundaries. I'm experiencing signs of burnout or I don't want to experience signs of burnout. And I know that at the rate I'm going, I'm likely to. So here's what I'm doing to.

protect my productivity to make sure that I'm still a valuable member of this team. I need to be setting some boundaries around my time. Would it work for me to block out this time, that time, whatever? But working through the discomfort of having those conversations and doing those things, and then when push comes to shove, actually following through and saying, I'm sorry, I can't at that time. That will help a ton.

with just creating the mentality where it gets easier the more you do it. Where you just say, I can't, know, Friday, know, Fridays at that time are, that's family time. Or don't expect me to respond to emails over the weekend because that's when I'm as committed to my family as I am to my job during the week, that sort of thing.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:06:01.903)
Very insightful. Thanks Esther. And I just, you know, I just thought about it. I love the angle. I love when you mentioned a tool, know, Shedding, Calendar. Are there other tools that people can actually use to achieve this? And is there a role for technology in this?

Esther (01:06:21.553)
Excellent question. I generally keep things pretty low tech. I use my Just my Google calendar for pretty much everything But I do like if you look at it today. I have an hour blocked off. I volunteer at my son's school and For actually be this is a great example for the entire first semester of the school year. I Had good intentions. I kept telling the teacher I want to volunteer and she said these are the times that would be most helpful and I would say okay, I will

I will try to block that time off. And week after week, I didn't block it off. And inevitably, something would get scheduled. That's not the fault of the people scheduling the meetings. That was available time on my calendar. That's my fault because I didn't block it out and say, this time is reserved for something else. So when I finally put that together, I think it's good to be transparent about this because I'm somebody who talks about this and is very aware of this. And I still struggle to do it.

Again, progress over perfection. When you notice that you're having a hard time with something like this, you don't beat yourself up about it. You just acknowledge it and then you take responsibility for, well, now that I know, what am I going to do? So, first of all, I went to her and I said, actually, that original time that you sent me, it's kind of prime time. If I block that time out every week, it's going to have a pretty negative impact on my work productivity. Are there any other times that would be helpful for you? So...

you know, having that conversation, communicating, advocating, saying, still want to help, but can we find, you know, some better common ground? She gave me a time that works well. Immediately, I blocked it out for the entire rest of the semester. So now, that is what I do, and there's no question of getting double booked. So I think a low tech, you know, Google calendar type thing is helpful. We've also got a paper calendar that has the family schedule on it so that I can pair those things and know

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:08:00.927)
you

Esther (01:08:18.165)
You know, our weekend family commitments come first. So this Saturday is baseball tryouts. That's what I'm going to be doing. I'm not going to try to get an extra work project done. I'm not going to try to get brunch with a friend. It's family time because it's on the calendar. I will say, though, I just started using an app called Opal. I'm not sponsored or anything. It's free. But I use it to set boundaries around my social media time, which is not something that we've

talked about extensively, but ties very much into sleep, productivity, boundaries, et cetera. When you've got it at your fingertips, any spare minute you find, you're going to scroll for a little bit. And then you're to tell yourself, I don't have time to exercise or take a walk or call my dad or make lunch. Well, I found that to be false once I no longer had social media to eat up all of those little windows. So there are, you know,

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:08:59.039)
Yeah.

Esther (01:09:15.701)
tech things out there that can help. I have social media blocked on my phone from 6 a.m. to 8 p.m. Well, I have gotten hours back in my day because that's not the default option anymore. So I think tech can help, but I also think we tend to overcomplicate things. And you really want to kind ask yourself, like, what is the simplest and easiest way that I can get this thing done? So instead of searching for Reddit threads or being in the app store,

what's the productivity app that I could try or what will help me? Like just, just start doing something. Just start blocking out your calendar. Just start, you know, firing off those emails and take meaningful action rather than sort of telling yourself you're, getting something done, but really you're just in like learning mode.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:10:01.708)
Amazing. mean, amazing. Google Calendar is a lifesaver. Like if we can master that alone, will save us tons, you know, and tons of troubles. Thank you so much, Esther. And I'm that from you as well, because I tend to, I think I'm one of those who is sitting on the app store all day looking for the next tech, you know, the next software that I can use to make myself more engaged, more productive and all that. Whereas,

Esther (01:10:29.51)
Exactly.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:10:31.38)
Overlooking, you know Google calendar that can actually really help me. So yeah, thank you for sharing that I'm sure that will be helpful to a lot of listeners, you know, and it's very easy Like it's it's the easiest one anyone can convey their hands on so no excuses anymore really Thank you for leading us in that direction. All right, so finally we're getting to the

Esther (01:10:49.963)
Yes.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:10:59.786)
Last call question for the day before we get into our rapid fire questions and I'm excited about the rapid fire questions because we get to know you a little bit more. All right. So our last question for the day, it's about going from being overwhelmed to becoming empowered. And so if someone feels stuck in a circle of overwhelm, what are the first steps they can take today to regain control?

and start striving again.

Esther (01:11:31.731)
Great question. And overwhelm is one of the number one things that I see that we just get paralyzed into inaction and we don't want to do the wrong thing. And we end up doing nothing because we don't know what the quote unquote right thing is.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:11:40.17)
Yeah.

Esther (01:11:45.203)
Getting yourself a quick win is one of the best things that you can do. And that's exactly why I mentioned the five minute kind of pause during your day, because that's something small and relatively easy that you can start doing immediately. What's tough is that when you're feeling overwhelmed, you don't have any momentum. You're, you know, an object at rest stays at rest. So you're just sort of like stuck spinning your wheels. And what you need is to just start getting some wins under your belt. Start

showing yourself that it is possible for you to take action and reap the benefits of it. And it doesn't matter what the action is, it's just you saying you're gonna do something and then following through and doing it. So maybe it's a glass of water first thing in the morning. Before I have a cup of coffee, I drink a glass of water. Just something where you can feel like, all right, I did that. I said I would and I did it and that feels good. And then once you have that little bit of momentum, then you do a little bit more. Then you do a little bit more. And instead of looking at the whole

know, mountain that you're trying to move, you're looking at one shovel full of dirt at a time and saying, can I do one more? Yes. Can I do one more? Yes. And next thing you know, you've got this growing mound behind you and a shrinking mound in front of you and it feels more doable. So I think that's, that's one. It's like, get yourself a quick win. Another is to get some accountability. When you're feeling overwhelmed, one of the things that can help the most is just someone outside of your brain.

Being aware of what you're trying to do. Hey, you said that you were going to do this this week. Did you just knowing that somebody else is involved? We have like a little bit of people pleasing tendencies where it's like, I told her I would, I want to do it. So she's not upset or mad or disappointed, but it's also just like, helps keep this stuff at top of mind. So if you are working with a personal trainer, you've got that accountability to know we set up these two appointments this week. I'm going to go to them. I'm paying for them. This person is going to be waiting for me. So a little bit of external accountability.

especially in the beginning where you're building that momentum can help a ton. And then I'd say the third thing is to start developing awareness of your patterns and what are kind of the things that trigger my overwhelm or any, you know, any sort of thing that I'm trying to work on. What are, you know, here's an example. I've learned that I generally eat a pretty nutritious, well-balanced diet that I feel good about.

Esther (01:14:14.761)
But peanut butter is my weakness. And there are times that I will have a jar of peanut butter in the pantry and I'll just eat it like a normal person and it's like not even on the radar. There are other times when it feels like every opportunity I get, I'm sneaking into the pantry with a spoon to eat peanut butter out of the jar. And for a long time, it felt really kind of disconcerting that I was like, why is it that sometimes I'm normal and sometimes I feel out of control?

And I started to collect data and realized I have a much harder time regulating my peanut butter consumption when I'm stressed or tired. And my husband's in the military, so he often travels to work and my stress levels increase when he's gone or when he's about to leave. And I started picking up on that pattern. It wasn't at random. It wasn't that some days I was just totally out of control and some days I wasn't. It was that when I was, when I was stressed or tired, I was less

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:14:50.634)
Okay.

Esther (01:15:14.089)
good at regulating my emotions and my behaviors and I would take out, would stress eat the peanut butter. So once I had that awareness, A, just having the awareness helps because you can keep it at top of mind, but B, then I was better able to say, well, how can I make this easy on myself? Do I want to continue to have peanut butter in the house at all times and then try to white knuckle my way through when I'm feeling stressed? Or should I just now anticipate he's about to go on a trip?

Maybe I just won't buy a jar of peanut butter at the store this week so that I'm not faced with that ongoing temptation. So that's just an example of how picking up on your patterns can be really helpful. So maybe you notice that, yeah, I have this weekly one-on-one with my boss and I am so anxious every week before it that I, you know, engage in XYZ behavior. Once you know that, then you can figure out, what can I do to stop repeating

this pattern, but it all starts with the awareness. And instead of just it feeling like this big overwhelming mess in your head where you're just like, everything is terrible and I'm out of control, you can parse out very specific things of, actually this is doable. Everything is figure outable. And if I do it one, the one thing at a time, I can make major progress without feeling like buried under the weight of it.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:16:31.751)
Our semester and you you literally took a particular phrase out of my mouth. It all begins with self-awareness. It all begins with awareness. Very valid, very interesting points. You also spoke to identifying your triggers and that's, you know, that's what being self-aware is about. If you're aware of your feelings, your emotions,

You know picking up on patterns It would help you to be able to you know channel your energy in the right direction or to do what is right because now you know the consequences when you go in this direction as against you know when you're doing this so understanding yourself Self-awareness is key like it's it's foundational. It cannot be overemphasized and paying attention to your triggers, you know identifying those patterns and

not just identifying them, but then knowing how to also fix them, which are some of the things that Esther has been able to share with us on this call today. Identifying areas of your life. Yeah, I also took down accountability. I think that's also very important. We all need that one person that can hold our hands, be the mentor.

whoever it is that can hold our hands and help us to say you have committed to doing this for this year and I'm going to see it that you do it at the end of the year. You check it off your list as one of the things that you decided to do and being able to do it. I think that in itself gives, it reduces overwhelm when you say you want to do something and you do it.

Esther (01:18:20.458)
Yes.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:18:22.168)
spoke extensively about that and I've seen that you know work in my own personal life when I started to journal my thoughts you know before I started to journal my head is always like filled with so many things and you know it begins to feel chaotic until I learned about journaling and the moment I start to you know write down those ideas is like you know some things are leaving me like I'm transferring them into

into a safe, you know, through journaling and from the fact that I've been able to now write them down, I can then begin to map out actions and strategies on how to achieve them. You know, very, very important. And another thing that you also said, one step at a time back to the progress over perfection that we talked about, you missed it, one step doesn't mean to stop completing. You can pick it up, you know, from wherever it is that you stop.

So much value of this conversation today and so much useful for life. This is holistic. It's beyond just career. It's well rounded and that's why I was excited when I saw your profile and I'm like, okay, this is something that will be of great value to our listeners because it's, mean, what's the worth of having this successful career when your health is failing, when you can't even enjoy?

the benefits that comes from all of that. this is very instructional and very helpful. Thank you so much, Esther. We've been enjoying having this conversation with you. And we're getting more excited because we have three more rapid fire questions to get to know you more and connect with you. All right, so personal insight. What is one habit or ritual that helps maintain your own resilience?

What's that magic for you?

Esther (01:20:21.897)
Yeah, it's funny you make that that size with your hand. I keep gratitude journal and it is roughly that size. It's this little notebook that I keep on my bed every night before bed. I write down three to five things that I'm grateful for. I just fill one page and I have found that it's one of those things that you don't, I don't necessarily notice the benefits day to day, but I noticed the difference when I don't do it. I noticed that it helps me keep a

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:20:38.586)
Mmm.

Esther (01:20:52.373)
positive outlook on life because I am challenging myself to always find things to be grateful for. And honestly, as a middle class American with a roof over my head, a fridge full of food, heat when I need it, air conditioning when I want it, clean water, know, the ability to brush my teeth and get dressed, I have a laundry list of things to be grateful for. But I find that writing things down, whatever comes to mind each day, just really helps me have that mentality, even when

I'm also faced with, with adversity is I remember there was a time I was very sick, like throwing throwing up sick and I had my husband pulled over on the side of the road so that I could throw up. And I remember at that moment feeling gratitude that I had positioned myself so that I wasn't throwing up into the wind and getting it all over myself. And that was just such a moment where I was like, wow, it must make a difference that you think about this every single day.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:21:45.339)
So.

Esther (01:21:50.547)
because in the midst of something that really sucks, you're also able to find a positive. So that's one really easy thing that you can do that doesn't take much time. There's really no argument against it, but it can have a really positive impact on your life.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:22:05.99)
Awesome. I love it. I love it. Gratitude, Jar. I love it. Thank you so much. All right. So what's your go-to activity or practice to recharge after a long

Esther (01:22:16.981)
You know, this is gonna, it's gonna sound kind of lame, but also very relevant to what we've been talking about. Honestly, at the end of a long week, I look forward to getting into bed early with a good book and getting some sleep. I just know that if I want to get the most out of my weekend, I need to wake up Saturday morning feeling refreshed, not like I'm gonna spend the whole weekend in zombie mode and then dread Sunday. I want to use Friday night into Saturday to...

just kind of wipe the slate clean so that I can actually enjoy the weekend that I've worked hard to protect for myself.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:22:52.498)
Alright, so let's move into the fun facts. If you could have dinner with any historical figure who embodies resilience, who would it be and why?

Esther (01:23:03.605)
This is a great question and I'm glad that you gave me a heads up on these questions because I would have had total deer in the headlights if you'd asked me spontaneously. So I gave this one a lot of thought. I don't know if you have read the book, The Sun Does Shine. It's by this man, Anthony Ray Hinton, who was wrongly convicted of multiple murders and was on death row for almost 30 years before he got exonerated and released. I'm pretty sure there's a movie about him now.

But I read that book and just the fact that he even survived that is so incredible. But the fact that he came out the other side with the kind of attitude to be able to say the sun does shine. Like every day I was on death row, I woke up and the sun rose again. was continuing to go on. There was always something good happening and then something to kind of rely on.

I just think that's so incredibly inspiring. And if you can't take some lessons from resiliency from someone who spent nearly 30 years in prison for something they didn't do, I don't know if you can learn from anybody.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:24:13.922)
Wow. Wow. Wow. That was really deep. Like, you know, I mentioned that I think in pictures and I just, I just, my imagination ran wild as you started to talk about that. And it made me feel a bit emotional that for someone who have gone through that to still see, to still have a positive outlook on life, what's our excuse really? What is our excuse? That's a really impactful one.

I'm glad that we are landing this plane on that very inspiring story that you have just shared. And in fact, I'd like to get more details. If you have a copy of that book or something, you could please, if you have PDF version of it or something, you could just share it with me or I'd like to also read up about it. I've been going through that for 30 years. have to have, I say the sun, just shine.

That's inspiring, that's motivating and something everyone needs to hear and to learn from. And I'm excited that we are ending on that note. Thank you so much Esther for being a part of today's episode. It's been enlightening, it's been insightful speaking with you. The practicality is what I enjoyed the most, the fact that...

You know, these things are not just high up there. There are things that we can easily relate with and we can easily implement in our daily life. So thank you so much. I know that our time is also fast spent. Forgive me. But we are rounding off just now. I know our guests would, okay, what's your final take away for our guests as we wrap up this session? What will be your final take away? What would you like?

say in closing.

Esther (01:26:11.785)
I hope you know that you're never stuck and there's always something that you can do and that you pick just one of the things that we talked about on this episode and you experiment with implementing it right away. And you use that as the first step to getting yourself some momentum and make the positive changes in your life that will help you be healthier, happier, and more successful in your career.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:26:35.592)
Awesome. Thank you, Esther. So how can our viewers, our listeners find you?

Esther (01:26:41.121)
I have a podcast and also wrote a book both called to your health. So if you have a health or weight loss goal, you want to dive into the big rocks, the support system, the compassion and ownership that you need to reach that goal to your health. I also have almost 300 episodes of the podcast and you can find out all the other stuff about me at estheravent.com.

Olajumoke Fatoki (01:27:03.892)
Thank you so much Esther for spending time with us on this call today. We've come to the end of this episode and until we come your way again next time keep thriving and prioritize your health because that's where everything else flows from. Thank you so much Esther. It's been a pleasure speaking with you and I guess I'll just release you at this time. 

Esther (01:27:27.477)
Bye.


Esther (01:27:53.781)
Thank you so much for having me. Bye.